Why do I torture myself?

Could it be for the cereal? Or maybe it was because I knew that my son would absolutely throw a complete and total 2 year old tantrum F-I-T if we didn’t have any more syrup. God forbid. Pancakes and waffles are a major staple for breakfast. Oh and french toast. Anything that you can dip into syrup, it’s in. Well, we ran out. And wouldn’t you know it, they sell some at the grocery store. They sell lots of it. Maybe I should start buying things by the case so I don’t have to go so often. But then again, that presents a new problem as we don’t have a truck, van or SUV to carry it all in. Instead, we have sold our van and have purchased a lovely newer smaller car. Would you like to know what will fit into the trunk? This:

That is our exact stroller. It fits nicely into the trunk. And not much else. I mean, maybe a few small plastic bags or something, but certainly not any decent amount of groceries. We could definitely fit more in if we didn’t take along the stroller. But I love my new stroller. It works well for my two kiddos. That is, when they stay in it.

So, we went to the grocery store today. Luckily, we really only needed some syrup and milk. It cost me $62 dollars. Just going in for two things, come on! You ought to know better than that. You see Stove top stuffing for .69 cents and you need two boxes. Then you remember that you are almost out of cheese. And if you ran out, well, what would the mice eat? I sometimes think Eddie and Alexa are part mice. They couldn’t survive without some kind of cheese product. So I’m walking and thinking, good, I only have 3 things in my cart, excellent. And then I get to the cereal aisle. Oh man. I get in trouble down that aisle. They have coupons and sales. What a winning combination. I see Berry Burst Cheerios (or some variation of that) and it’s only $1.75, and then there is a .75 cents off coupon. So of course I have to get that.

So, we went to the grocery store today. Luckily, we really only needed some syrup and milk. It cost me $62 dollars. Just going in for two things, come on! You ought to know better than that. You see Stove top stuffing for .69 cents and you need two boxes. Then you remember that you are almost out of cheese. And if you ran out, well, what would the mice eat? I sometimes think Eddie and Alexa are part mice. They couldn’t survive without some kind of cheese product. So I’m walking and thinking, good, I only have 3 things in my cart, excellent. And then I get to the cereal aisle. Oh man. I get in trouble down that aisle. They have coupons and sales. What a winning combination. I see Berry Burst Cheerios (or some variation of that) and it’s only $1.75, and then there is a .75 cents off coupon. So of course I have to get that.

Well, that worked out for the next couple of aisles. And then they started touching each other. Pulling each other and then they both simultaneously began to hang their heads out the opposite sides of the cart. Then their hands were dangling very near to the floor. My son was trying to pull in everything that was in his reach. He grabbed at a few things. Most of which were taken away and replaced in another (though wrong) spot by my father. As soon as he took something away, I’d have to correct Alexa and make her sit up, stop biting her brother or get her leg off of him. Then he would start. He was laying on her, pushing on her and telling her things. Such as, “No, Lacka. I don’t like you scratch my face.” Pretty good sentence I thought. lol…. my kids are beating each other up, while I am shopping for things I’m not sure I really needed in the first place. And there I walk down the aisle with an empty, and very large double stroller. A man walked passed me and looked at my ride with no babies. He said to me, “It appears you are missing something.” “Yes,” I smiled, “I believe I am.” But how did he know I was missing my sanity??? Ah geez. I just needed to get out of that store.

When we finally made our way to the registers, there was a HUGE line. of course. It always happens when you need to get out of the store quickly. So, we waited. And waited. My children seemed to amuse the other patrons of the store. At least Alexa was friendly and repeated "Hi!" to everyone she saw. "Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. hi." Well, I much prefer that to the screaming tantrums that Eddie tends to throw

I made it out of the store and to the car with my large ride, and my two kids. Oh and I made them both sit in the stroller this time. As we said goodbye to the car buggy, I thought Eddie might cry. He didn’t want to leave. They both got in the car and went promptly to sleep.

I made it out of the store and to the car with my large ride, and my two kids. Oh and I made them both sit in the stroller this time. As we said goodbye to the car buggy, I thought Eddie might cry. He didn’t want to leave. They both got in the car and went promptly to sleep.

Well, I’m glad to be home. But I still haven’t unloaded the groceries yet. They are all still sitting on the counters in the kitchen. Eddie is sleeping right now and I do not want to wake him. (I of course put away all the cold stuff first)

Alexa is playing, pooping and entertaining herself with Eddie’s diapers and a plastic bin. Ah the easy days. I only imagine one day not too far off in the future, she won’t be so easy to please.

So why is it then, that I torture myself this way? Because I have to. Because I’m the mom, and because we needed syrup!

omg.

Seriously. Calgon, take me away.

Actually, I’m quite certain that I’ll never get to have a relaxing bath again. Ever. For the rest of my life. I spent a short five minutes in a cold shower. Well, cold in the sense that room air was freely flowing into my shower. My daughter no longer sits quietly in a bouncy, or in a swing, bumbo or exersaucer while I take a shower. Instead, she walks confidently, as if with a purpose, over to the side of the shower and she wisks open the curtain. She stares in amazement at the stream of water magically flowing out of the wall. WOW! How cool that must seem to an eleven month old. And as she stands there, the water is splashing off of me and onto her head. She leans in closer to get a better look at what I am doing with a white bar of dial. Indeed it is captivating. The front of her shirt is getting wetter and wetter by the second. Though cute and curious, it only means I am going to have to change her entire outfit once again. She pulls the curtain open, I say Lacka close that. (We call her Lacka because my son so affectionately attempted to say her name on the day of her birth and came up with Lacka instead of Alexa.) Cute. It stuck. Anyway, she looked at me as if, “You can’t be serious. I’m trying to watch here.” The water is pouring onto the floor. I pull the curtain closed once again. Eddie walks in and sees the cat on the bathroom counter top. Sadly, this has become his new home to eat in privacy. Oh and for the betterment of Alexa’s diet as well. Since the cat food was in the kitchen, Eddie kept taking little pieces of it and putting it on Alexa’s high chair. In essence, my son was feeding my daughter cat food. And so many times I had to investigate what was in her mouth. I would be cleaning the kitchen and see her still chewing, when I knew well and good that she was finished. I had to poke around her mouth with my finger. Oh and what did I find??? A piece of cat food. Oh man. Poor baby. Eddie thought that was pretty cool too. He’d give her something, and she’d eat it. How incredibly amusing. Poor baby. Poor cat. *sigh*

So now his food is on the counter, because still on the floor it looks very appetizing to my baby girl. (I’m wondering if she developed a taste for Friskies???) So here is Corona minding his own business, on the bathroom counter, eating his food. I’m taking a shower and Alexa is admiring mommy freezing and rinsing as fast as humanly possible. I see Eddie walk into the bathroom just as I say, “Lacka, close the curtain.” His little hand reaches for the cat’s tail. “Eddie, STOP THAT! You’re going to hurt the kitty! Eddie, Eddie, Don’t pull his tail.” It seems to fall on deaf ears. It’s too irresistable. He pulls at the tail, the cat wobbles and nearly falls off the counter. He loses balance but he doesn’t go over. OMG. I’m nearly at my wit’s end.

What does that mean anyway?? to have wit? I am nearly without my wit.

Let’s see, according to Mirriam-Webster’s online help, it says something about: reasoning power, mental soundness, mental capability and resourcefulness…also at a loss for solving a problem. Oh definitely. That’s me. To a capital T! All the wit is gone. Out the window, bye, bye. Elvis has left the building.

Oh and it’s nap time.
Let me share a picture of the “Wit Stealers”.

Someone tell this kid to go to sleep!

My back is itchy, it’s got little baby hairs all over it, (I’ll explain in a moment) and my little booger won’t come out from underneath the computer. I’m sure she might have actually been tired around this time had my father not sang her “row, row, row your boat” like 100 times. He made her fall asleep. Or maybe he squished her and she passed out in his arms. lol….or maybe she got overheated. He’s always hot. So maybe the heat and the repetition lulled her into a deep semi-comatose state. Anyway, she slept when normally she would not. It was like 5:30 or so and we had just finished with some dinner at my mom’s house.

Lord that woman can cook. I’d be lucky enough one day to maybe remember a few things that she makes. I think my husband will like me more if I do. Poor thing, I don’t feed him enough. (according to my mother) He is still pretty thin. We had a lovely beef brisket that was ever so tender, home cooked pinto beans with yellow rice, and a crisp fresh salad with feta cheese. Yum! There is just something that my mother does to her food to make it taste just out of this world. I think she laces it with cocaine. No. I’m kidding. She’s just a good cook. I think she went to some cooking school like many moons ago. But I’m totally loving it. Oh. Except for the raisin bread thing. Now, don’t get me wrong. I can stand to eat raisins, just not with anything else. I like my raisins alone. Yes. I know. I’m weird. I honestly can’t help that. It’s funny though. That inside of that, what was it called?? Raisin bread? Rice pudding bread? Cake? I don’t know. I’d have to call my mom to ask her. Well, inside of that bread thing she made, she told me that she didn’t put in very many raisins. I said, “good.” Well in the slice that she gave me, I had just about the entirety. No. I’m not kidding. And super picky me, I pulled out every darn one of them. Mostly while my son was demanding that I give him some ice cream (in between picking out raisins, taking a small cautious bite for me and giving my son some ice cream that was layered over the top of this cake thing.) Ok, now in the piece that my brother got, I believe he said he had like 1 raisin. My dad also got 1 raisin. And me?? yes, mine was saturated. And my father looked longingly at the raisin covered napkin in front of me. Poor dad. My mother just rolled her eyes at me. Sorry mom. I tried to get my son to eat them. He wanted no part of that.

{{just like mommy}}

Well, I’m still itching. Mom is also an amateur hairstylist. ( I know you are wondering how those two statements are even remotely related to one another.) I’ll get to that soon. Now I say amateur only because she doesn’t now nor has she ever worked in a hair salon. She does however, have her cosmetology license. So she has been doing some side work through the years, like say since the early 70’s. She’s given my brother a number of handsome chili-bowl cuts, and also given me and my sister some straight edge bang jobs. Not so cute on an adult though ‘eh?? I had to find a new stylist. She likes to do what she likes to do. And although she’s never ruined my hair or made any of it fall out. I think I really like to have other people cut my hair now. I’m grown, I think I can handle it. ok, I’m straying from my point though. I took my 2 year old son over to have his hair trimmed. She does a fabulous job on him. And boy does he ever look handsome! I’ll have to learn how to post some pics in this blog soon. I absolutely need to show off my babes. So here’s where the little hairs come in. As parent, guardian, mom, I must sit with the little man in my lap while she trims and I help to steady his head. And now, all of the little hairs have made their way to my lap, arms, hands, feet and I’m not quite sure how they got down my shirt or on my back, but I can feel those little itchy things all over me and I am about to go nuts. I need to get in the shower and wash them off like ASAP! Now I totally understand why my dear husband must get right into the shower when he gets home from any and all haircut trips. (I don’t plan on disclosing this information, I’m just going to try and shower quietly.)

I put her in her crib. My computer is right next to her bed. She likes it when I’m in here with her. I think she also falls to sleep easily when she knows I’m right next to her. yay, I think sleep may be coming soon. Nope. I was wrong. She cries. Oh I don’t think this is a good sign. Maybe she wants some more milk?? Of course. Wouldn’t you want some more milk if you were her? And you were about to go nighty night? Milky poo for you? baby, waby?? mommy will get it…. hold on…..
gotta run! Duty calls~

How do you get paint off your fingers?

Right now I have a lovely shade of grape frost on my right index finger. Not so easy to come off since it’s not Crayola wonder paints. I took on a small project that involved sanding a few pieces of wood furniture and masking the rest up so as not to get paint on the other parts.

I would absolutely say that I did not do as fine a job as my brother would have done. But I’m thinking, it’ll do. Painting round ball knobs on little chairs is not as easy as it would seem. But I like the color, despite what my mother and my husband think. They really wanted me to leave well enough alone.

It’s kind of scary actually how much my husband acts like my mother sometimes. It’s eerie. But I like him, so I think I’ll keep him. Not to mention the fact that he made dinner while I was outside sanding the wood. Neat trick huh? I go outside and play with sandpaper and paint, and he stays inside with the baby and he cooks.

I love it.

Now Miss Alexa ate as much as a 3 year old might. (I’m guessing here, since I do not have a 3 year old to compare to.) She kept screaming when she would run out. She would let out this shrill scream and point to the bowl of pasta and spaghetti sauce on the table. I’d cut up the pasta and eat a few bites of my own… only to be beckoned to her call once more.

I really ought to put her on my right side, since that ear is already mostly broken anyway. Now, the reason I didn’t put her bowl in front of her is because she would immediately dump the entire contents onto the floor. I think that she likes to feel the bowl full of food. Something about the way it looks as it’s hurled helplessly into the kitchen. She has a lot of power in those tiny fingers and hands. It also makes a lovely mess, either on the kithcen floor or on the carpet nearby. She always seems pleased with herself. So we don’t give her plates anymore. She gets pieces at a time. And that young lady is turning into quite the chow hound.

That’s awful huh? Comparing my darling baby girl to a dog. She’d make a cute puppy though! Well anyway, I ate dinner with paint on my finger and I’ve already tried washing it off, scrubbing it and rubbing it over and over. Now it just feels kind of sensitive from all the scraping. It’s still on there and I’m not really done with the painting. I still have to do the little foot pieces of the chair. They came out kind of ugly. Guess I’ll have to fix that tomorrow.

I can’t stay up too late tonight as I didn’t sleep well last night. (totally Alexa’s fault) She’s teething and I think tooth #4 has her pretty cranked up at night. Can someone tell me why the teething is worse at night? why can’t it bother them in the day and let them sleep peacefully at night? Or is that just like, um…… not! ever going to happen. Maybe in fantasy land.

Oh and my back hurts. I better go and put the food away. I think that’s one of our trade offs. My husband cooks, then I go in there and clean the stuff up. I try that sometimes. I cook (but sometimes not as often and sometimes not as good) and then I try to get him to do the dishes. He sometimes just forgets. He’s not real big on dishes. Maybe he forgets on purpose. I bet. Well, once again it is night time and the kiddos are in bed. It’s nearly 8 p.m. and there are many chores yet to be done.
Chores. ok pa! I’ll get right on that! Right after I say g’nite to ma~
We’ll chat some more tomorrow

I made it through the day.

Yee haw. I got another one in. I think these days I’m beginning to lose my mind. I like to hear the rain on my daughter’s “noise machine” and just pretend I’m going to be falling asleep soon. Really, I’d like to crawl up next to her in the crib and let someone else take care of me for the next 6 months or so. It’s so much easier than being the mom.

I think I watched Monster’s Inc twice today, and Aladdin once. I managed to get both children down for a nap at the same time. Other mother’s out there will attest to the fact that that is an awesome accomplishment. During that time I did not slug down a Corona nor did I take a little siesta. (Maybe I should have done both). What fun and exciting thing did I do?? I folded laundry. Kids laundry. I picked up toys that were rocketed to all corners of the living room and dining room by my son. Toys that weren’t toys mind you. My son thinks it’s his purpose in life to play with all of my “cooking tools” as he so lovingly refers to them. It doesn’t matter what it is, it’s always cooler than what I can buy from Tonka, Little Tikes and Playskool. Ain’t nothing like the real thing baby! He loves my spatulas, my pie/cake slicer, my beater blender thingies and of course we mustn’t forget the can opener. I can’t keep him out of those drawers. It took my husband almost 6 months to insert the drawer locks for the other cabinets, so if I start on him now, maybe by the time Eddie is three they will be in. Oh yeah, I also loaded the dishwasher. Big whoop. They’ll all be dirty again in a matter of hours.

I did manage to sit down for about 40 minutes during Days of Our Lives. So what’s up with Sami and E.J?? Didn’t he like kidnap her or something? I mean, most people I know wouldn’t hang out with someone like that. Of course, maybe if someone like E.J. kidnapped me, it wouldn’t be such a bad thing. I only got to ponder the new characters for such a short time as I heard the bedroom door being thrown open. (There is no door stopper there because my husband is afraid my children will eat them, so he removed them all. ) And wouldn’t you know it, there are little slice marks where the door lock is and has repeatedly hit the wall. It’s like this in every room where the stoppers were removed from. Now he has to go back and fix the holes. lol…..

Men. I say let them eat them. I think those things are probably safer than some of the kids toys they play with. Half the darn things are being recalled lately for lead paint. So I’m all in for letting them suck on the door stoppers. After they realize it doesn’t taste all that good, then they’ll stop right?

Maybe. I’m still working on getting my two to stop gagging themselves. I’ll have to post more on that one later. I used to have to put socks on Eddie’s hands to make him quit. Now because Alexa is testing the waters there, he figures that there might be something to that after all and he is revisiting the whole deal. Lord give me patience.

I think I could go on for hours more, but my dear husband needs me to tuck him in. Or clean something. I’m just kidding. He knows better. I am tired and believe it or not, it’s only 8:25. The monkeys refuse to sleep past 6 a.m. What I wouldn’t give to sleep in. I really do miss those days.

Not even Ambien can help me now. (for those of you not familiar with Ambien, it is a lovely little pill that helps you to fall asleep and maintain a restful state)

disclaimer: {{I am not in any way advocating drug usage on this site, nor do I use drugs or associate with those who do. Drug usage and over usage can be a very bad thing. Not all drug usage is bad however, I have been known to take an aspirin from time to time. So please do not take my drug comments to heart. }}